It’s hard to determine what makes someone a legend. As best I can tell, legendary status is usually bestowed upon those whose stories are simply the best. This past Monday, a high school senior in Maryland managed to achieve legend by being arrested for repeatedly mailing packages containing both cow and dog shit to his school’s vice principal. Once wasn’t… Read more →
Patton Oswalt is a genius. Now I don’t say this as some sycophantic fan, or online devotee. To be honest with you, I can count on one hand how many of his comedy specials I’ve seen and I can count the number of movies/TV shows he’s been on using an abacus (don’t ask me to demonstrate, abacus time is private… Read more →
Most wedding days are lovely scenes filled with images of friends, family, flowers and a couple in love (unless she’s knocked up and it’s Marriage by Shotgun). However, the last thing one couple getting married in a Catholic church in Salt Lake City this past Saturday expected to see was the conjugation of a second couple going to the chapel on… Read more →
I’ll be honest with you, sometimes I’m genuinely afraid of what might be in the food that I order. Fast food and greasy spoon restaurants have a horrible reputation for what goes on in the kitchen…you know, the things you don’t see, and hope to Christ you don’t taste. When I was in high school, I used to work at… Read more →
Now those of you who know me know I love tits. Big ones, small ones (not too small, I mean…Jesus), young ones, old ones (both within legal reasoning), but not long or floppy ones though, because a man has to have standards. I also happen to love reading. While this might make me an educated pervert, or just a chauvinistic… Read more →
