Looks like someone’s caught in a wicked pissah
When I used to fuck up, which was a lot, I’d try to do whatever I could to cover up what happened, because if you destroy something and can replace it, who has to know? I all I knew back then was I wanted the benefit of doing whatever the hell I wanted while not having to hear someone’s mouth about it.
Unfortunately, this method of thought isn’t going to turn out as well, for Quinnipiac University dropout Danielle Shea, who was arrested Sunday after calling not one, but two bomb threats from her own cell phone, all because she didn’t want her parents to know that she wasn’t among the students who were actually graduating that day.
She seems like a “kick the can down the road” kind of gal to me.
Shea was afraid that her mother, who has been sending her a shit ton of money (in the thousands, obviously) to pay for tuition, would find out that she wasn’t even enrolled in school this year, instead choosing to fuck that money off on beers and shooters every day at Murphy’s Pub with her boyfriend Fitzy (actually, I can’t substantiate any of that, but her name is Danielle, she’s from Quincy, Massachusetts and is obviously Irish, so I mean come on…can you blame me? I mean even if I’m off the mark, it’s probably by an inch or two)
According to police, Shea admitted to calling the threats in, first by saying there was a bomb in the library, but then when that didn’t seem to raise many alarms, she decided to double down 17 minutes later saying,
“Several bombs are on campus. You haven’t cleared out graduation. That’s not a good idea.”
Now read that in a Boston accent, with a bit of a drunken slur, because no one thinks this dimly fully sober.
If that wasn’t enough, after the two threats, police managed to quickly identify Shea’s number; when they found her, she was wearing a cap and gown, because plan B was to just go to the graduation ceremony and act like she was graduating anyway (which, had this moron been thinking in the first place, should have been her first option, since they generally don’t recognize people at the event by name). Needless to say, they ran her ass in, threw the book at her and is currently being held on $10,000 bail.
The whereabouts of her boyfriend Fitzy is currently unknown, but chances are, he’s back at Murph’s getting wicked hammered with his other girlfriend Charlene (pronounced SHAH-LEEN).