Even if you still think it’s a man’s world, it’s time to recognize that International Women’s Day is about women who keep the lights on, and not only because her ass looks great in those jeans.
Hey fellas, can we talk for a minute?
In case social media didn’t properly fill you in, today is International Women’s Day, a day where we’re supposed to celebrate the economic, political and social achievements of women.
Did I lose you yet?
I hope not, because every bit of those achievements have everything to do with the way you and I live today, except we go out of our way to either ignore or marginalize those efforts.
Much like it’s actually pretty sad that we have to have a Black History Month every year to highlight the contribution of black Americans, it’s doubly sad that we have to do this with women, as if we don’t know how much they’ve meant to our development as a society while we as men, do the thing we like to do and build empire while destroying everything in our path.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not so naive as to think that we couldn’t get as far as we’ve gotten without breaking some eggs (and some heads), but throughout time, as we go about the business of telling women all the things they can and can’t do, they end up doing so much more to keep the world moving, and we only seem to pay attention when they want the recognition they’ve earned.
We need women. Not to do our bidding, but to be our partners. And they are our partners, whether you like it or not.
It shouldn’t be lost on any of us that this day started out as International Working Women’s Day, a day to celebrate the fact that women were even allowed to be a part of a workforce that decades later still manages to pay them only a fraction of what we as men make for doing the same work.
Today is a day that men should embrace as much as women largely because it is a shared history. Without women, none of our efforts to fight and build across the world would’ve come to a halt, because as they built our tanks, bombs and planes during WWII, they tended to our wounded, healed our sick and raised our children in hopes that they would be better than the generation before.
Are we?
And it’s not just about America or American women…this is about every woman everywhere around the globe who took one for the team and yet still has to beg for a place at the table.
On a day like today, we’re arguing about whether or not Kim Kardashian is right or wrong about showing off her tits and ass on social media as if it’s even a referendum that needs to happen.
In 2016, we’re still arguing about how much skin it’s proper for a woman to show.
Now I’m no defender of anything Kardashian, but regardless of what you think your morality is, what is our right to tell her no? The only right we have is the right to look away, to let it be a part of someone else’s life.
There are men who can judge women by whether or not they’re a mother or not, as if a qualifier for being a good woman is keeping their clothes on, and holding babies.
There's two types of baby mamas/wifey….Choose wisely! pic.twitter.com/d2YrzHNFp3
— JAMAICAN LEGEND™ (@Jaymoola) March 7, 2016
Even when it feels like something decent is being said by holding up the image of a mother as a social standard, we as men aren’t really being honest, are we?
For every man who thinks Ayesha Curry is the golden standard of a right and proper woman, there’s just as many of you who can’t wait to go home and beat off to the latest pic of Kim you heard she was naked in.
But today isn’t about what you want, or who you value more.
Today is about saying, for once, that women are every bit as necessary as we are necessary, and if we’re truly going to foster equality between the sexes, it’s that admitting that International Women’s Day exists because we act like it shouldn’t through our actions and our thoughts.
In many parts of the world, women are still treated like meat. In your part of the world, a woman has to sue a hotel because they couldn’t do the least little bit to protect her from a stalker.
We need women. Not to do our bidding, but to be our partners. And they are our partners, whether you like it or not. Whether it’s in the bedroom or the boardroom or the classroom or the gym or the any other room you can think of.
And as such, it’s upon us as men to give them room, room to grow, room to thrive and room to be whatever it is they want to be, not because we let them, but because we support them.
I’m a man, and wanting to see women with a seat at the table doesn’t make me any less of a man, nor would it make you any less of a man either. Women have always been our secret strength, and instead of judging them by how round their ass is or how well they cook, we should judge them as we would judge ourselves, and in many cases, we should judge them even better.
None of what I’ve said here is all that radical, not if you already see women as fellow human beings. For those of you who don’t, this would be a perfect time to change.
And you know what’s so awesome about all of this? You can still admire a woman’s beauty. You can still let her be the thing that makes your day brighter. You can still feel like you feel every time a woman enters a room, but with the added benefit of recognizing that she’s every bit a person as you are.
That’s what today is about.
International Woman’s Day reminds me that women are important, and it reminds me that many of my fellow men still can’t see that.
As a man of color, I know that change doesn’t come over night (boy, do I know that), but I do know that nothing will change unless we do, and it’s not about handing over control to women. It’s not about giving them everything they want, because, hell, you don’t deserve everything you want, but a little respect goes a long way, and it doesn’t cost us a dime.
At least we can try, anyway.
Good talk, I’ll see you out there.
Hashim R. Hathaway (Uncle Shimbo) is the host of the Never Daunted Radio Network, and proud father to NeverDaunted.Net. You can reach him on Twitter @NeverDauntedNet